The way to love anything is to realize that it might be lost. – Gilbert K. Chesterton
Every now and then we have a revelation there is only one thing that really matters. Take away whatever is keeping us busy and we discover without that one thing nothing else really matters.
To find this one thing, inspiration can sometimes be found in the strangest places. One of my favorite movies is City Slickers (1991) starring Billy Crystal as Mitch and Jack Palance as Curly. While riding the trial, Mitch and Curly share the following philosophical conversation:
Curly: | You know what the secret of life is? [holds up one finger]
Curly: | This.
Mitch: | Your finger?
Curly: | One thing. Just one thing. You stick to that and the rest don’t mean shit.
Mitch: | But, what is the “one thing?”
Curly: | [smiles] That’s what you have to find out.
After watching the scene, it occurred to me the one thing that provides the answer to the secret of life is love. Love for my family, love for my wife, love for the amazing gifts in my life and love for myself.
With love, I feel whole and centered. Love gives me the energy to keep moving forward and to face the challenges with confidence and to celebrate the victories with enthusiasm. Every day I attempt to find love in my life and to become love for others.
Love is generous and amazing. To make love a part of your day, every day, consider these seven amazing ways to become love:
- Love is a choice.
There is a difference between love, the feeling and love the choice. Throughout life, we often have the opportunity to fall in love. Feelings of excitement are often associated with love when it is first experienced.
It can feel very good to fall in love and it can feel very empty when the love is taken away. However, in order to live a happy and purposeful life it is important to choose to become a loving person. Even though we can’t always control or predict when we may feel love, we do have the power to choose to become love. We get to choose when and how to act with love.
Opportunities exist every day to choose love.
- Love yourself, first.
Before you can share love, you must first have love for yourself. Otherwise, how can you share what you don’t have?
However, it may be difficult to find happiness and peace if you don’t think of yourself as worthy of receiving love. Self love is the most important element of becoming a spiritually healthy person. Love for self gives you balance, it centers you, and it keeps you on track when circumstances in life attempt to derail you.
- Give yourself love.
The challenge to giving yourself love becomes when you have never learned how to love yourself in the first place. Some may find it difficult to self love, not because of their feelings of worthiness, but because they don’t know how.
Because of childhood events, or other life experiences, some don’t even understand they are allowed to self love. If you have difficulty with the idea of self love, consider imagining you are holding the smaller you; the younger you. What would you say? Would you show love? Chances are you would. Extend that same love to yourself today.
- Make time for love.
What’s more important to you, watching television or providing your focus to the person standing in front of you requesting your time and attention? Often times when we think we are too busy to give some of our time, some of our love, we are really just making the choice to do something else.
The five minutes it might take to be fully present for someone or to return the telephone phone call to a friend who needs to talk, or to give and receive a hug can be the best time invested all day – and this investment will come back to you with more meaningful returns than perhaps anything else you may do.
- Try to see the best in others, not the worst.
When you expect good things to happen, good usually does happen. When you expect the best in someone, you often receive that, too. Bottom line: You usually get what you asked for in life.
Begin learning how to experience those in your life (co-workers, friends, and family) as essentially good, worthy and full of incredible value. Look for ways they please you, surprise you, and make your life better. They will feel your admiration, confidence and love for them.
- Do your best to do your best, never try to do your worst.
Becoming love takes effort. Becoming love is a commitment to show grace and compassion to others no matter how upset or discouraged you may feel. Becoming love has no margin for short-cuts or intentional ill-will. When you set out to try to do your best, no matter the circumstance, it will come back to you 20-fold or more.
- Celebrate the love in your life.
Love is a miracle. When you are able to share your love and become love you have something worth treasuring and celebrating. We should never take love for granted – it can be snatched away quickly and without mercy.
Celebrate your loving heart and celebrate how blessed your life is becoming as you become love to more and more people. Celebrate the “one thing” in your life with passion and enthusiasm.