I love you – I am at rest with you – I have come home. – Dorothy L. Sayers
Like a shooting star racing across the night sky, the past few months have gone by in a blur.
Managing multiple projects at work, selling our house, and helping Emily select a college have made our busy lives, busier. With so much to do, there has been little time to stop and remember what this activity is for. Sleep and an occasion workout have provided helpful interludes. But for me, the best reset button is writing.
The most important question
It feels good to have the words find me again.
Writing works like a compass. When I feel like I’m not heading in the right direction, I turn to writing to point me back to the path meant for me. On this path is where I re-discover what fills my soul with passion.
It’s here I’m reminded of the most important question I will be asked when my path comes to an end: With the time you were given, how did you love?
I could respond with the obvious answers: I tried to be the best father I could be; I was faithful to my wife and I showed kindness as often as possible.
But when I look a little deeper – when I feel a little deeper – I think my answer will be: I loved until there was no room left.
- I loved Brandon, Caitlin, Andrew and Emily unconditionally and allowed their love to pour back into me until there was no room left.
- I loved Mary Beth deeply. I gave her all I could and opened my heart to her beauty until there was no room left.
- I learned how to start loving myself a little more as my path began to level out. In my journey, I replaced anger with acceptance; shame with grace and sadness with joy. I reached out to the little boy inside me and loved him until there was no room left.
After Mary Beth and I sell our house, we will be without a home. But with the gifts we’ve given, and for which we are sincerely grateful, our homelessness will be exciting as we consider the next chapter.
No doubt we will find a house that meets our needs right now. I’m sure it will be warm, comfortable and full of light. Our new house will bring us new experiences – and memories. But most of all, our new house will continue to be a home full of love.
My plan is to keep filling it with love until there is no room left.