I can feel the forgiveness in your words, so leave whatever happened in the past there and keep moving forward. Keep acknowledging your pain and keep asking for help – you are on the right track.

Alex

I am a 36 years old female. I have survived sexual abuse, am severely emotionally scarred and feel so alone all the time. I have avoided getting on medication for years but its times like these that I wonder if I need to be medicated. Like many in this blog, alcoholism and drug addiction runs in my family. I feel so uncomfortable without alcohol in public situations, even with my family and the couple of friends that I have. I just never know what to say and end up looking like an idiot or like I’m boring. I know that I’m not boring, just scarred and don’t know how to break this vicious cycle.

I have secluded myself for years and don’t even like to attempt social situations without alcohol. I have tried talking to counselors and most of them looked at me with this befuddled, almost condescending look. It’s hurtful and annoying and I don’t even know if I can even do it again.

I have done and said so many things that I regret while drinking, I don’t even know where to begin with apologizing but something has got to change before I lose myself.

There have been a few posts on here that have given me hope, thank you all for your blatant honesty. I know that it is not easy; you people are the 1st to hear these words coming out of my mouth. Any suggestions? I don’t know about AA, I don’t know if it would work for me but I’m willing to give it a shot. Thank you for listening and good luck to you all.

Chris – So true. Drinking is but a symptom; finding the cause is the key. Good luck to you – I’ll be rooting for you!