Five Electrifying Ways to Unplug and Actually Connect
As we get past our material wants and instant gratification we connect to a deeper part of ourselves, as well as to others. – Judith Wright
Article written by Alex Blackwell. Connect with me on Facebook.
I have two laptop computers, a smart phone, four email accounts, a Twitter and a Facebook profile, an iPod Shuffle, four television sets and a blog. The tendency to use such devices or visit these websites frequently and then become absorbed with the information we are gleaning from them is a condition called hyperconnectedness. In the spirit of full disclosure, I suffer with this condition, too.
There are many times when I tune in a Kansas City Royals baseball game (with the volume muted) as I’m listening to my iPod while online keeping up with email traffic, social media statuses and readers’ comments. To meet my responsibilities, I do need to be plugged-in, but sometimes I can be overly connected and actually miss out on what’s going on around me.
The technologies available to us do make certain things simpler. Finding information is just fractions of seconds away (Google proudly presents the length of time it takes to return listings for a particular search term); finding and staying connected with old friends is made easier with social media websites; and reading and replying to email can be done while waiting to pick-up our children from their after-school activities.
Our hyperconnectedness to these technologies can also create a barrier around us and actually shut out the people trying to reach us. Life will continue to move on –we just won’t be in it. I know this to be true all too well.
When I first got my smart phone I was intrigued by the ability to check my email while waiting for Emily to finish her gymnastics class. Arriving ten minutes early, my eyes would be on the phone’s display and not on my daughter. I would miss her balance beam dismounts for the sake of scanning information that was not nearly as valuable.
The best antidote for my hyperconnectedness is balance and awareness. While I’m learning to become more mindful of the need to unplug, there are times when I fall short. When I do, I have these reminders to help me disconnect from the technology and actually connect back to my life.
- Triage your technology.
It may be impossible to unplug everything at once. Take an inventory of what is vying for your attention and prioritize the true need and usefulness of each item. When online or at your computer, consider not opening your email’s inbox so your attention can be placed on the task at hand.
When I’m writing an article, and can’t make any real progress, I will close my internet browser or turn off the wireless adapter so I won’t be distracted by online time-wasters. This practice gets me off the computer sooner and back to my family.
- It’s all about timing.
Find a time when you can enjoy all of the things you love being connected to without ignoring the needs of others, or even your own personal needs. Sometimes when we try to abstain completely from a habit or activity, the results are short-lived.
Instead, carve out time each day when you plug in to what interests you and enjoy it without feelings of guilt interfering. For me, that’s first thing in the morning.
I wake up around 5 a.m. to check email, blog comments and what I missed on Twitter and Facebook from the night before. The TV morning news is on in the background and for the next 30 minutes I shamelessly enjoy my hyperconnectedness.
- Take a technological Sabbath.
There is a growing trend to declare one day of the week as technology-free. On this day, many are unplugging from what holds their attention the most. Televisions, computers and personal devices are turned off.
While the intent here is well-meaning; it may not be practical for everybody. There are many jobs that require employees to use the Internet or other technologies on a daily basis to perform their responsibilities. If you are in this position, consider taking a half Sabbath when you return home for the evening or over the course of the weekend.
- Think outside of the box.
We can be creatures of habit. Many have created habits around how we use technology. For some, technology is the primary activity that occupies most of their time. If you find yourself in this situation, begin to think of other activities you can do which do not require being plugged in to anything; other than just life itself.
Here’s my list:
~ Take a walk with Mary Beth after dinner when we simply talk and catch-up.
~ Read a real book with pages that can be turned with my fingers.
~ Go to a baseball game. Once there, I take in the sights, sounds and smells of the event and enjoy the sensation of being outside.
~ Spend time with my children doing things they enjoy.
~ Sit on my deck to think, pray and enjoy the gifts in my life. - Acknowledge the difficulty.
Change can be difficult. It’s important to recognize in the beginning it will be hard to do things differently. There is comfort in the familiar and in how we have always done things.
The inclination to glance down when we hear a text message arrive on our phone, regardless if we are in middle of a conversation with someone else, and then read and reply to the text message, can be hard to resist.
The urge to check email as soon as our feet hit the door at home, regardless if our family is trying to get our attention to share their day, can be difficult to resist, too.
Acknowledge in the beginning it will not be easy. Rather than measuring your progress on a negative scale, what you’re not doing; measure your success more positively by realizing what you are doing.
Begin by making slight adjustments with your ability to unplug. Soon, your level of real-life connection will become more powerful. As your connection to life beyond technology continues to grow, stop and allow yourself to realize how much fun you are having and the personal fulfillment you are gaining.
The process of reconnecting
Life beyond the computer screen or the high definition display on our television sets is much brighter and far more interesting. The hyperconnectedness we have to technology can be replaced with a new-found connection to life itself when we reach for the power buttons on the things meant only to be tools in our lives; not surrogates for our lives.
When we do, we feel a new power begin to take over. This reconnection with our loved ones, our faith and ourselves provides the real power needed. Soon, as this power begins to grow we can experience the status updates right in front of our eyes, we can reply with a spoken word across the dinner table and we can search, together, for whatever it is we are looking for in life.
Reconnecting gives way to a new kind of hyperconnectedness – one that will help us finish life strong and finish it with others.
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Comments
10 Responses to “Five Electrifying Ways to Unplug and Actually Connect”
What do you think?
Excellent advice that we all need in this technological day and age!
I loved this post!
Best wishes,
Rosana
I had tried to unplug for the whole of the past two months and work 14 hours straight without using the web. Totally not me. However, it was also through that period that allowed me to connect with new people all around me. Which is a pretty good thing.
I love to read your every word. You make such sense and really get to my thoughts and you really make a difference. Thank you for all that you give to me = to all. You are a gift.
Maz
Great article, just what God has been speaking to me about too.
I did that on Saturday, had a disconnected day, was so happy, fixed my sticking bedroom door, put a privacy lock on, went out at night with the wife to a birthday party.
I even got the kids to not connect to the net or play xbox for half a day. Do some music practice.
I have started reading a real book too, even in my lunch break at work, instead of catching up on emails and facebook. Hard to do, but it is necessary to have that balance that you mention.
God bless, love your blogs.
Chris
@ Meredith and Rosana: Thanks for reading – love having you here.
@ Daniel: 14 straight hours of work without using the Internet – good for you! I don’t think I could have lasted that long.
@ Maz: For me, the gift is in sharing and being a part of this community with you.
@ Chris: Sounds like a productive, and fun day. I got some chores over here if you have some more time. Glad you had this day to spend with your family.
every evening I like to watch TV for about an hour, to disconnect from work. My partner watches with me, but brings her PC to keep up with admin tasks that need done, but don’t really require much brainpower. Work means that I watch TV, she works and we don’t talk.
Being aware of the trap of being disconnected is the first step to reconnect more deeply with other people, especially our loved ones. It’s true that we can connect with them thru the internet, but using our ‘vision’ while typing with our computers is nothing compared to using our sense of ‘touch’ as we embrace the people that matter most to us
@ Jocelyn: Very well said. Being fully present and able to reach out and touch does indeed provide better “connection.”