Find the Woman You Want to Be | The BridgeMaker

Find the Woman You Want to Be

By on Jan 15, 2013

Women are always beautiful. – Ville Valo

…everywhere women want to be whole together
make stew, simmer all that is true
in the broth of human goodness, invite
every man, woman and child to toss in
a favored spice, a wish, a way to rebuild
our fractured world and with tomorrow
in our wombs,
we will carry bowls of peace
from hearth to each table, however remote…
Perie Longo, from her poem What do women want. (Used with permission of the author)

What do you love about being a woman?

If you could say a few things you love about being female what would they be? Here are the things I have heard from women:

  • I love being a woman because I want to express my nurturing and emotional sides with pride.
  • I love being a woman because I can bear and raise children.
  • I love being a woman because I want to feel strong through sensitivity and caring about myself and others.
  • I love being a woman because I can feel some permission to ask for help.

What are you working on?

Most women want to feel freer to take care of themselves. Fashion and body size, shopping, having fun – do these matter too much? What do you want from your relationship, how do you feel if you are single?

Is there a deeper way to find peace and comfort?

How about considering finding stronger connections with you through the myriad choices of self reflection such as:

  • yoga
  • meditation
  • mindfulness
  • martial arts, for example.

In addition, consider healing work such as:

  • somatic therapy,
  • focusing,
  • mindful awareness, and many more.
  • How women find their true voices and the courage to speak

    Do you experience anxiety? Have you been abused or mistreated? Are you depressed, feeling trapped or hopeless in your current situation?

    Perie Longo’s poem excerpted above talks about rebuilding our fractured world with women coming together to make a stew, inviting everyone to add a spice, to carry bowls of peace to the table.

    What are the ingredients in your bowl of peace?

    You might want to :

    • spend more time in Nature,
    • help others who are in trouble,
    • plant a garden by yourself or with others,
    • read the work of others for hope and inspiration,
    • start a support group that focuses on meeting your needs.

    Woman-peace-power is here for you.

    Start by taking one step towards finding your inner woman-powered voice. Chose a suggestion I have made, or one you have been longing for.

    Begin to retrain your thought process toward what is healing for you on the inside rather than how many new styles of clothes you have in your closet or what clothes size is small enough for you.

    Look deep into yourself to find the spark that can become a pilot light of determination towards inner-peace.

    Believe in yourself because you are a worthy woman.

Phyllis Klein is a psychotherapist (LCSW) in private practice in the San Francisco Bay Area specializing in helping women with anxiety, depression, eating disorders, and recovery from trauma. You can learn more about Phyllis at

  • A beautiful post Phyllis that makes me glad I’m a woman!

    • Phyllis Klein

      Dear Carolyn, That’s such a simple and wonderful way to put it! Best wishes, Phyllis Klein

  • Amazing! Thank you.

    • Phyllis Klein

      Dear Tess, Thanks so much for your comment. I’m so happy that you like the blog. Best wishes, Phyllis Klein

  • Beautiful post. Yoga, meditation and mindfulness have helped me through the years. I love being a woman as well. Thank you!

    • Phyllis Klein

      Dear Cathy,
      Thanks for your appreciation. I hope more women will find ways to incorporate these activities into daily life–not always an easy task.
      Best wishes, Phyllis Klein

  • I love that poem by Perie, Phyllis! Thanks for sharing. I love being a woman because I am strong and capable of unlimited love.

    Thank you, Alex!

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