The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves, and not to twist them to fit our own image. – Thomas Merton
Relationships can be difficult at times. While some couples never seem to have any differences, most relationships are not only bound together by love, but also hard work, determination, blood, sweat and tears.
Even though it can be really hard to maintain a relationship, it’s worth the effort if it’s a healthy partnership. But how can you tell if a relationship is worth fighting for?
5 Telling Signs of Healthy Relationships
We all dream about having a perfect relationship, but does it really exist? What is such a perfect relationship anyways? Perhaps a healthy relationship is more fulfilling than pursuing the illusion of a perfect relationship.
Here is how you can tell if you are leading a healthy relationship:
- You wholeheartedly accept each other
Unhealthy relationships are often characterized by attempts of manipulation. Manipulative partners strive to make the other person conform to their wants and expectations. In most cases, this is being done without even considering the wants and needs of the counterpart.
The root cause for this manipulative behavior can be found in the attempt to exert control over the partner. This problem manifests itself in one person’s inability to accept the partner, wholeheartedly. As a result, one part tries to change or manipulate the significant other to the best of their ability.
In contrast, partners that lead a healthy relationship have reached a level of deep appreciation which allows them to accept the partner, wholeheartedly. In fact, everyone who’s ever been truly in love knows that one does not love another person despite all their faults, but because of them.
Healthy relationships have reached a stage of maturity in which both partners have learned to let go of the need to change each other—as both have learned to appreciate each other as they are.
- You are both willing to give more than you get
Partnerships that are built upon the expectation to get more than you give lie on a shaky foundation.
Sadly, partners in unhealthy relationships rarely give without expecting something in return. As a result, an unhealthy relationship does not give for the sheer joy of giving, but solely for the purpose of benefiting.
Partners that lead a healthy relationship are able to give without demanding anything in return. The idea of giving freely helps building an exceptionally strong and healthy bond between two individuals, if it is based on reciprocity.
- Self-centeredness has made place for a shared vision
People that are giving up all their dreams for their partner might find themselves in a relationship that is not so beneficial for their personal growth. In fact, individuals trapped in unhealthy relationships will sooner or later discover that the relationship does not contribute to the realization of their dreams.
Instead, such an unhealthy relationship might even require one to give up one’s personal dreams.
The opposite is the case in healthy relationships. These are the kind of relationships in which both partners can freely pursue their individual dreams. Even more so, healthy relationships are characterized by individuals that have developed a shared vision; partners that have started to share the same dreams for the future. A self-centered vision of the future has made place for a unified dream about the things to come.
- You leave room for development
We all know what it feels like if a partner tries to push us into a certain direction. Often times, guilt is being used to make us do things that we would rather not do. This kind of manipulation is being applied in order to avoid the evolving of one’s partner.
Such forms of relationships do not leave room for development. We do not change; we do not progress because there is something that tries to keep us right where we are. Something that is terribly afraid about the possibility of change.
Healthy relationships on the other hand leave room for the development of each partner. In fact, both partners have come to realize the benefit that comes with change. More often than not, change is an integral part for the rejuvenation of the relationship.
- You both treasure the intimate secrets of your relationship
A surefire way to tell if you’re leading a healthy relationship is when you both value and estimate your shared secrets and intimate moments like treasures. Such relationships treat the weaknesses and insecurities of the partner as sacred matters that are not to be shared with third parties under any circumstances.
Treasuring the intimacy of the partnership helps to create a strong bond between the partners. It allows both to reveal private secrets, weaknesses or insecurities without having to fear that these are used against them or shared with others.
Knowing that your partner treats your secrets as confidential treasures can be extraordinarily beneficial for the relationship. Being able to share one’s weaknesses and secrets is an incredibly supportive aspect of a healthy relationship.
It will not only make room for individual awareness, but it will also allow the partners to make up the other person’s weaknesses. Something one can be really grateful for.
By Your Side
Healthy relationships don’t just appear out of nowhere. They take patience, time and the determination of two people who truly want to go together through life.
It’s the kind of relationship that inspires and motivates both partners to become the best they can be. If you have found the right person for such a healthy relationship you know that this very special individual will always stand by your side through life’s ups and downs.